Find Birth Parents With Origins Genealogy
I Found My Birth Parents and Can Help You Find Yours.
Hi there, I'm Jenny Wallentine
I co-founded Origins Genealogy to connect adult adoptees with their birth parents. But before that, I lived the journey.
Now, I’ve assembled a world-class team dedicated to reuniting you with your biological family.
I'm an Adult Adoptee Like You.
Like you, I was placed for adoption. Like you, I wanted to find my birth parents.
I reconnected with my birth mother when I was nearly 30 years old.
When I was 50, I found my biological father.
At Origins Genealogy, we’re more than a birth parent finding service. We’re a birth parent finding service that has lived it.
Finding My Birth Parents Was Long and Difficult.
Finding Yours Doesn't Have to Be.
I learned a lot through finding my birth family. Knowing where I came from was transformative and gave me a sense of power I hadn’t realized was missing.
It filled me with a sense of joy and relief that’s difficult to put into words.
I started Origins to give other adoptees the same positive, life-changing experience I had.
Minus the challenges I faced.
Let’s cut out the decades-long search and skip to the part where you get to connect with your birth parents.
Find Birth Parents Jumplinks
The Origins Genealogy Advantage
Origins is a full-service genetic genealogy firm that uses the genealogy proof standard.
We combine the latest in DNA testing with traditional genealogical methods:
- Archival research
- Social media research
- Online database sleuthing
- and more
Our researchers are the best in the business.
Whether you’re looking for your biological dad, your birth mom, a half-sibling, or any other biological family member, Origins Genealogy can help.
We offer free case reviews and will help you understand every option in your quest to find your biological parents.
Our fast-growing genealogy research firm will never be too busy to provide the personal attention your unique journey deserves.
We Find Birth Parents. If We Don't Find Yours, You Pay NOTHING.
If Origins Genealogy takes your case, we will find your birth parents or refund your money–GUARANTEED!
With our money-back guarantee, what’s stopping you from finding your biological parents?
100% Success Rate and Glowing Reviews
“After years of frustration trying to solve the puzzle on my own, Origins staff were able to find the mystery birth father very quickly. They provided a comprehensive report outlining the DNA matrix that proved the person, with bonus background info and photos.”
—Deb C, Google review
Origins Genealogy has a 100% success rate identifying biological parents for cases we have accepted.
Our customer service is second-to-none, and our client reviews show it.
Benefits of Finding Your Birth Parents
For those who were raised with their biological parents, it may not seem important for an adoptee to find birth parents. Like so many other things in life, it’s hard to understand how someone feels unless you have walked in their shoes.
The best way to describe it would be like wearing a pair of shoes that protected your feet, kept them warm and dry, and looked good with your clothes, but only you could tell that they just didn’t fit right. Maybe they rubbed your heel wrong or they were too narrow. Only an adoptee knows what that feels like.
Fortunately, there are ways to get the shoe to fit just right. This can happen when you find your birth parents. No matter how wonderful your adoptive family is, the nagging unanswered questions can be uncomfortable like ill-fitting shoes.
Knowing the truth of his or her birth mother’s circumstances can help an adoptee to better process the past, forgive, and let go of feelings of abandonment.
Feelings of abandonment can leave some adoptees with issues such as separation anxiety and low self-esteem.
It’s easy to have negative, confused, or even angry feelings about having been placed for adoption.
Knowing the truth can bring a sense of peace and closure that benefits adoptees as well as their close family members.
Your history of adoption is unique. Isn’t it time you came to peace with it by learning about it?
Knowing your birth parents means knowing your heritage, knowing your people. It provides a sense of finally knowing exactly where you fit. You finally know who you look like and can learn more about your unique personal family heritage.
This connection to past generations can broaden your self-identity and provide an even greater sense of belonging.
You may decide to learn a new language, visit a country where your ancestors lived or explore a new culture. This can make the shoe fit just right.
Top 5 Reasons Adoptees Search for Biological Parents
Before finding my birth parents, I had many questions. I’m sure you can relate. There’s not a simple answer to the question of why an adult adoptee wants to search. Every adoptee is different, but I believe there are 5 primary motivations for adoptees to seek out their birth parents.
Everyone wants to know who they look like. As an adult adoptee, you have lived your entire life looking like … no one!
Despite nearly 8 billion people in the world, you haven’t known one single soul on this planet that looked just like you. A pretty lonely feeling, right?
Adoptees are also curious about who their birth parents are and what they are like. What questions do you want to ask when you meet your birth parents?
Where in the world did I come from? In a day and age where knowing your ancestry is becoming more and more popular, adoptees are once again left behind, not knowing their true genetic heritage.
Your family tree is just as important as others and you deserve to know. Now, advances in genetic genealogy can shine a light on your origins. If you have been searching for birth relatives, you can now get the answers with our personalized genetic genealogy service.
Questions like: Has anyone in your family had…? I always thought to myself “Good question, but I don’t have any idea.”
Unfortunately, most adoptees don’t have a clue about medical conditions that run in their families. That always frustrated me, so I just quickly skipped over that section.
As I got older, this became more important because I had developed some medical conditions that needed answers and more information.
To Fill A Void
My adoptive parents were absolute rock stars when it came to taking care of me. (I say that with empathy for those adoptees who may not have had such a wonderful experience as an adopted child).
No matter how good my life was, there was always something missing. It’s like a jigsaw puzzle with a single piece missing from the middle … incomplete.
Once I learned about my biological parents, that hole was finally filled along with finding the peace I had longed for. Often, adoptees develop wonderful relationships with a birth parent or half-sibling after finding them.
To Thank Them
Many adoptees feel fortunate that their parents did what they felt was best for them by placing them for adoption.
It’s common for an adopted person to want to say thank you.
Biological parents—and especially birth mothers—are generally relieved to learn that their adopted child has had a good life.
It can be very healing on both sides to connect after wondering about each other for a lifetime.
Which of these top 5 reasons do you most relate to?
How Can I Find My Birth Parents For Free?
If you want to search for your mom or dad on your own, here are some tips for you.
Be warned, however: searching for biological parents on your own can be a long and disappointing process.
Even though our founder, Jenny Wallentine, found her birth mother for free, she spent many years…and even then she caught a lucky break.
Here are some tips. Some of these will cost some money, others will cost only your time.
Hopefully, these will get you started in the right direction.
Get Hold of Your Adoption Records
Accessing adoption records can be tricky, depending on your state.
Your sealed adoption records should include your original birth certificate and other identifying information that may put you closer to identifying your parents.
Some state’s laws require a court order to release identifying information about your birth parents to you.
Other states require mutual consent to release identifying information, meaning that your biological parents have the right to refuse.
In most states, you should be able to access non-identifying information about your adoption. This will include details such as the family background, health, and city of residence at time of your adoption.
Visit our finding birth parents by state page to find out the regulations for your state of birth.
Participate in Adoption Reunion Registries
An adoption reunion registry is like a dating site, only for adult adoptees to reconnect with their birth parents. If you’re lucky, the reunion registry will work for you.
Keep in mind, however, that the adoption reunion registry route will depend on the following:
- Your lost family members are actively trying to find you
- Your parent is participating in adoption reunion registries
- Your parent is signed up to the same adoption registry you are.
Of course, if you have the time and dedication, you can register in all of them and hope that your dad or mom are doing the same.
Talk to Your Adoptive Parents and Extended Family
This is something you should probably do anyway. Hopefully, your adoptive dad and mom are supportive of your journey.
They may also remember details that could guide you in narrowing down your search.
Take a Genealogical DNA Test
When Origins Genealogy finds birth parents for our clients, the first step is always an AncestryDNA test.
You can also take a DNA test on your own and look for close matches.
If members of your birth family have taken the same DNA test (e.g., Ancestry, 23andMe, etc), you will see them in your test results as close DNA matches.
(At Origins, we upload your results to several other DNA databases to broaden the chances of getting a match).
With luck, you can identify your dad, mom, or other birth family members in your results.
Often, however, results are far from clear-cut and you may find yourself looking at a muddle of vague genetic connections, with no clear indication how to proceed or make sense of it all.
If You'd Prefer to Cut to the Chase, Hire Origins Genealogy!
How the Origins Genealogy Process Works
1st Step: Let's Get Your DNA Test Results
We partner with Ancestry©️ because they have the largest database of all DNA testing companies out there. Since Ancestry©️ is the largest DNA database, and they allow us to download a copy of your DNA, we then upload the raw DNA data to other available databases: MyHeritage, FamilyTreeDNA, Genomelink, and GEDMatch.
The purpose of uploading DNA data to other databases is to “cast the largest net” and allow us to include all the possible DNA matches before we analyze the results.
Already taken a DNA test?
If you have taken a DNA test other than Ancestry©️ (such as 23andMe©️, for example), we still will need genetic testing from Ancestry©️ because they have the largest database, but do not allow DNA matches from other databases (such as 23andMe©️) to be uploaded into their database.
If you already took a DNA test from Ancestry©️, then you are ready to move onto our upload and analysis service (2nd step).
Haven't Taken a DNA Test with Ancestry©️?
2nd Step: Upload and Analysis
After you received your DNA results, we will now do the ‘Upload and Analysis.’ This is the 2nd step we do to find your birth parents or relatives.
During this process, we will download a copy of your DNA and upload it into four other databases we are partnered with:
While your DNA is being uploaded, we ask that you send us a detailed email of any information you may know about your biological relatives, your closed adoption, surnames of parents, birth dates/locations, family relationships, and any other relevant information.
We often find that people have some information, even if it is small, that can be helpful to us.
3rd Step: Reviewing Your DNA Test Results
Once we complete the 2nd step (‘Upload and Analysis’), you will have a personal phone call with Jenny Wallentine to go over the results we found.
If you do have enough close DNA matches needed for us to find your relative, we will then provide you with a custom quote. Should you choose to accept our proposal, we will deduct the first initial $500 ‘Upload and Analysis’ fee from the quote.
Most of our genealogy service packages range between $1,800-$2,600. Normally, these packages with the accompanying reports take us between 2-4 weeks to complete.
4th Step: Research and Reporting
Once you have agreed for us to find your biological parent, we start the research. We spend hours providing DNA charting to show you how we concluded that X is your parent.
We also provide you with online records (original birth certificate, death certificate, divorce decree, adoption records, etc.), documents, newspaper clippings, photos, and contact information for close relatives.
This requires the use of genetic genealogy, traditional genealogy, access to many databases, and some detective work. Our packages are very detailed.
5th Step: Professional Liaison For Initial Contact
Origins Genealogy loves happy endings. And there’s no ending more happy than a good adoption reunion.
As an adult adoptee, it is not always easy to reach out to your birth parent. It can be quite a shock for the parent receiving the call.
After Origins has identified who the birth parents and birth family are, for an additional fee, we can make the initial contact for you.
As a neutral party, we can smooth the way for your first contact by crafting introduction letters, gathering photos to send, providing the research, and answering questions to ensure accurate information. This provides a comfortable and safe environment for all parties which generally leads to a much smoother transition to getting to know each other.
We Will Find Your Birth Parent or You Pay Absolutely NOTHING.
100% Money-Back Guarantee.
Upload & Analysis of Your DNA
“When you start, it can feel like a daunting task to find a family member. Fortunately, we’re here to help! With Origins Genealogy, this search will be easier than ever before and not just restricted to the pages of dusty old books anymore.
It is only natural when starting out finding a birth parent that some questions arise as soon as one steps into uncharted territory. Who better to ask those questions than someone who has been there all along?
Thankfully, we’ve got experts on hand and me personally to help. With Origins, your family history is no longer a thing of the past. Trust our experts to map out your pedigree, find missing relatives and discover your ancestors’ stories.”
Ancestry© DNA Kit
What Sets Us Apart:
The Origins Genealogy Difference
We're genetic genealogy experts
We excel in finding what others couldn't.
We have exceptional client reviews.
We offer a quick turnaround.
(2-4 weeks for most projects.)
We have strict quality control.
(We check every detail for accuracy.)
We’re one of the world’s top-rated full-service genealogy firms. We have decades of worldwide research experience and specialize in using DNA technology.
We offer unparalleled results in locating old family photos and stories, mapping out pedigrees, finding birth parents, discovering the whereabouts of living relatives, and connecting family members.
Personalized attention. Your project will be customized to meet your unique needs and goals. We enjoy exceeding expectations.
Being based near the Salt Lake Family History Library—the largest repository of genealogical records in the world—gives us a distinct advantage, as the SLFHL houses microfilm copies of millions of records from around the globe that have not been digitized and are not available in any online database.
In short, Origins is second to none when it comes to personalized genetic genealogy assistance!
Birth Parent Finding Service FAQ
We offer flexible pricing tiers to help you get the best value for your particular case when hiring us to locate your birth family. You can view these genealogy packages on our Origins Genealogy services page.
Absolutely. Finding your biological dad works the same whether you were adopted or not. Regardless of the reason of his being separated from your life, we still use DNA analysis and other research methods to pinpoint his identity and allow you to get in touch with him.
If you already know your birth mother, our job is easier. You have the DNA of two parents in your genome, but knowing one parent helps us isolate that parent’s genome out of the equation and focus solely on the genome of the missing parent.
Origins Genealogy does work with international adoptions, yes. If you’re an international adoptee looking to reunite with your biological family, call (801) 500-0900 and we’ll give you a free, no-obligation consultation wherein we discuss the specifics of your situation, including your country of origin.
While we are able to help many international adoptees, there are others we are not as certain about.
If we’re not 100% confident we can find your birth parents in your country of origin, we’ll tell you so.
You might as well give Origins a call and discuss your international adoption information with us for free!
While it may be true that the birth parent in question never took a DNA test, it’s almost certain that many of his relatives have. For example, birth parents can be identified even without a close match by studying and charting second cousin matches.
DNA matches indicate a biological relationship. The age and generation of a DNA match and the amount of shared DNA indicate the nature of those relationships. Amounts of shared DNA are measured in centiMorgans (cM) and reveal genetic distance.
The more shared DNA, the closer the relationship. For example, siblings generally share between 1613-3488 cM, while second cousins generally share between 41-592 cM.
Below is a chart showing predicted biological relationships based on shared autosomal DNA. It has been compiled by researcher Blaine Bettinger and is one of the charts most widely used by genetic genealogists worldwide.
(In the chart, “1C” = “First Cousin.” “2C1R” = “Second Cousin Once Removed.”)
You can see that there is a lot of overlap in the relationship ranges. For example, if a DNA match shares 1300 cM with you, they could potentially be an aunt, uncle, niece, nephew, grandmother, grandfather, grandchild, or first cousin.
Knowing the gender of the match rules out some of these options. Knowing the age of a match also helps narrow down the possibilities. Knowing the relationships of many different matches to each other helps narrow down the relationship possibilities even more.
This often requires extending the attached tree of a DNA match or learning exactly who the match is and mapping out their pedigree if they have not attached a pedigree at all.
Once several DNA matches and their pedigrees have been identified, points of intersection can be found, and the matches can be charted in a pedigree chart such as the one below.
In the DNA chart above, a DNA icon touching a box indicates that the person named in the box took a DNA test. Inside the box, the amount of DNA shared with adoptee Steve McCormick is listed (names and photos of living people have been changed).
This chart shows that Steve shares a lot of DNA with the descendants of Vangie May Winn and her husband Albert Dorus Webb—parents of Donald Dorus Webb.
Steve also shares a lot of DNA with descendants of William Ellis Stratton and Minnie Kartchner, mother of Leona Stratton. Note that DNA match “mtwinn” on the bottom left, a descendant of Vangie May Winn’s father David Winn, shares 173 cM with Steve, while DNA match Linda Maschger, a descendant of David Winn in the same generation, shares 516 cM with Steve.
This indicates that Steve descends from Linda’s ancestor Vangie May Winn rather than DNA match “mtwinn’s” ancestor Howard S. Winn, Vangie’s brother.
Note DNA match “ekartchner40” on the bottom right. He shares 97 cM with Steve compared to the 284 cM shared with DNA match Jacqueline Kay Hatch, a descendant of William Decatur Kartchner of the same generation.
This indicates that Steve descends through Jacqueline’s ancestor Minnie Kartchner and rather than “ekartchner’s” ancestor Culver Kartchner, Minnie’s brother.
This chart above represents only a fraction of the Webb, Winn, Stratton, and Kartchner DNA matches. Steve’s closest paternal DNA matches consistently descend from husband and wife Albert Dorus Webb and Vangie May Winn and husband and wife William Ellis Stratton and Minnie Kartchner.
How do these families connect? Vangie and Albert’s son Donald Dorus Webb married William and Minnie’s daughter Leona Stratton.
Donald Dorus Webb and his wife Leona Stratton had three sons and one daughter. DNA evidence examined was sufficient to determine that Steve’s birth father was one of these three sons.
Once the birth father’s family had been identified, obtaining the rest of the answers about Steve’s background was much easier.
Through detective work and sensitive phone calls to members of the Webb family, we were able to determine that one of these three sons attended the same school as Steve’s birth mother, and had at one time been in a relationship with her.
Yes! We can help you discover how your DNA matches connect. Often, traditional genealogy work is required to extend a DNA match’s pedigree back further.
We can often track down a DNA match’s phone number and call them to ask questions. This can be very helpful. For example, in one case the closest DNA match had no corresponding surnames in their attached tree. We obtained their phone number and called them.
After some discussion, the DNA match realized she and her husband’s names had been switched on their kits! She then provided us with the right tree, and this information helped the project succeed.
It can be frustrating to have no information about your birth parents. However, a DNA test is always the first step, as it can reveal so much.
In some cases, Origins can identify your birth parents from DNA results alone. In other cases, we must bolster genetic testing results with other types of research.
So, even if you don’t have the name of your birth father or mother, there is still hope.
You’ll never know until you take the test. Head on over to the Origins DNA testing page to begin.
If Origins Genealogy takes your case and fails to locate your biological parents, we will refund 100% of your package price.
However, with our 100% success rate, the chance of us not finding your dad or mom is highly unlikely.
Origins has a payment plan to help you afford our genealogy services. If the cost of our packages is prohibitive, just ask us what payment options are available to you.
Yes, Origins Genealogy can help you connect with adopted siblings, half-siblings, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, nieces, nephews, or other biological relatives. The process works similarly to if you were searching for your biological mom or dad: a genealogical DNA test followed by a consultation with Jenny Wallentine.
It can be frustrating when you can’t get your original birth certificate and other adoption records unsealed. But it doesn’t have to be the end.
When people start talking about adoption and finding birth parents, the common advice is to get hold of your sealed adoption records. But if you can’t get those, there are other avenues to take.
Origins Genealogy often can find your biological relatives with DNA matching and our amazing detective work—even without your sealed adoption records.
For a small fee, we can upload a copy of your raw DNA data to multiple databases. With access to all your closest DNA matches, we can study them to see where their pedigrees connect.
We can evaluate your particular case. If we believe your DNA matches provide enough information to succeed in your goals, we will provide a guarantee. There will be no risk of “paying for nothing in return.”
Yes! Many DNA matches are not instantly identifiable and don’t respond to in-system messaging. There are many ways around this.
For example, some have uncommon names, and so it’s possible to obtain their phone numbers through a subscription database and reach them that way to confirm they took a DNA test and learn their lineage.
Other times we can use a subscription newspaper database to find an obituary naming a DNA match’s parents. Once we get back far enough, additional birth records and census records for the family are in the public domain, and we can therefore frequently chart the pedigree of a DNA match even if they don’t respond to messaging through Ancestry or 23andMe or one of the other DNA databases.
For some reason, it’s frequently the closest and most helpful DNA match who will not respond. Once we chart the other matches (for example, second cousin matches) to see how their trees connect, we can often pinpoint the right family and identify the closest DNA match through this analysis.
Individuals taking DNA tests frequently use aliases. We often discover that the same alias has been used in other places online along with a DNA match’s full name. Other times, if we add an “@gmail.com” to the end of their alias it pulls up as a working email address and we can contact the DNA match that way. These are just a few examples of the initial detective work and traditional genealogy work done to identify and chart DNA matches.
We do not have a one-size-fits-all price. We evaluate each case individually. Based on the number of DNA matches, we will custom tailor a package for you.
Most searches for birth parents cost between $1800-$2600, and we have a 100% success rate to date with a money back guarantee.
You can participate in a mutual consent registry or any of the various information gateways in hopes of finding your parents on there.
You could scour social media for people matching your birth parents’ names, contacting them and hoping for a breakthrough.
Or, if you want to fast-track your process, you could hire Origins.
Origins subscribes to many subscription databases that allow us to digitally search phone and address records, obituaries, and other data. We have nearly a 100% track record finding contact information for living people through subscription databases, social media, and detective work.
We specialize in making those first sensitive phone calls introducing an adoptee to his or her birth family. We help an adoptee write a letter of introduction with photos.
We share DNA charting and explain how the DNA data prove the family relationship. We share every good thing we have come to know about the adoptee, which also helps reassure newly-discovered biological family members that it is safe to connect.
We help set up initial phone calls or meetings with the family. Since we are a third party representing the adoptee as opposed to the individual adoptee, the initial phone calls are less emotionally charged.
Family members have space to process the information, study the data and ask questions. When the first contact with the adoptee is made later, they know they are speaking with a true relative.
Yes! As professional genealogists, we often do this for our clients. We act as a neutral party to help ease the adoption reunion.
We can provide DNA charting to explain the genetic relationship, share letters, photos, and more about each other. Our liaison service offers a safe environment for both sides to experience healing and reconciliation with a minimum of awkwardness.
If you’d like our help with your adoption reunion, call (801) 500-0900 today!
In terms of locating your birth parents, our process is the same whether your adoption was transracial or not. Genetics work the same, regardless of whether your adoptive family shared your ethnic heritage or not.
That said, every piece of identifying information helps us home in on your biological family. Your ethnicity could be an important piece of the genetic genealogy puzzle.
So while we don’t specialize in transracial adoption cases, per se, we treat them similarly to any other closed adoption case: we analyze the evidence, perform research, and find birth parents (or other family members)!
Yes, when it comes to using our genetic genealogy and archival research skills to reunite you to your birth parents, a foster care adoption works the same as an adoption that was done through an adoption agency.
Regardless of the type of adoption, Origins uses the results of a genealogical DNA test to look for potential genetic matches already in the databases of Ancestry.com and other genealogy websites.
Based on our findings, we supplement the DNA testing results with deep archival research, online detective work, and whatever else we need to do to maintain our 100% success rate!
If you were a foster child who was adopted, Origins can help you meet your birth mom, biological dad, or other genetic family members. Call Origins Genealogy at (801) 500-0900 and we’ll get all your questions answered.
While it may be possible in some cases to find your birth parents on your own with a little research, in many cases an adult adoptee will need to invest some cash.
A genealogical DNA test, for example, costs money, as does access to many online genealogy databases.
And of course, if you hire a professional genetic genealogy company such as Origins, that will cost money as well.
With our 100% success rate and our money-back guarantee, it will be one of the most worthwhile investments you’ll have made.
Yes, Origins helps adult adoptees connect with their biological parents regardless of the religion or ethnicity of the adoptee, the adoptive family, and the biological family.
In the search for your birth relative, we perform the same genetic and archival detective work regardless of whether you were adopted in a Jewish adoption, Christian adoption, Islamic adoption, or secular adoption.
Knowing you were adopted in a Jewish adoption, though, gives us an additional piece of the puzzle that can help us get to the truth faster.
Yes, if you have a biological sibling who was adopted—either through a foster adoption, or through adoption agencies—Origins Genealogy can help you find and connect with him or her.
Origins can help you reunite with any living biological family member, from adopted siblings to your birth mom to aunts, uncles, or other kinship relations.
Whether you are looking for birth parents or birth siblings, Origins can help!
Many adopted persons love and respect their adoptive family and worry that searching for birth relatives will signal or dissatisfaction with their adoptive parents.
It’s important, however, to keep in mind that your longing to connect with your biological relatives is deepseated and very common among adopted children. It is not a referendum on your adoptive parents and their parenting.
The best you can do is honestly and respectfully share your feelings with your adoptive family, making sure to let them know that you love and respect their contribution to your life and that you need to meet your birth parents for YOU.
While it’s helpful to know your biological parents’ names, such knowledge is not a prerequisite to finding them. With a genealogical DNA test and our crack team of researchers, chances are that Origins Genealogy can locate them with or without their names.
- Gather any information you can about them from family members, adoptive parents, or anyone else that may know them.
- Check with adoption registries.
- If you know the name of the adoption agency that placed you, talk to them.
- Enlist the help of a professional genealogy service such as Origins Genealogy
In most cases, yes, your biological parents want you to find them. Generally, when parents give a child up for adoption, they spend the rest of their lives wondering if they made the right choice and thinking about how that child is doing.
In most cases, biological parents welcome a reunion with the child they gave up for adoption. If you parents are the rare exception and don’t want a relationship with you, then that’s a risk worth taking, isn’t it? Wouldn’t you rather take your chances and find out?
Biological mothers, especially, are often haunted by the choice they made to place their child for adoption. Many were young, single mothers when they placed for adoption, and were unable to adequately provide for their child. Many face persistent feelings of failure.
Many biological fathers are unaware that they fathered a child, much less that they have a child who was placed with adoptive parents. For these birth dads, a reunion can come as an extra shock because they’re also learning for the first time that they’re a dad.
“Parent” conveys several different realities: legal, practical, and biological.
This is one of the most common questions we hear from those considering giving their baby up for adoption.
Legally, adoptive parents are the “real” parents: they have legal custody and decision-making power for the adopted child.
Practically, adoptive parents are the “real” parents: they act the role of parents, including feeding, nurturing, teaching, and all of the other countless roles parents play in the raising of their children.
Biologically, adoptive parents are not the “real” parents, as the children don’t carry their genes. The “birth parents,” “biological parents” or whatever other term we want to use are the “real” parents in a strictly biological sense.
It might be possible to find your dad for free; each situation is different. Here’s a good place to start.
- Enter his last name on people search engines (BeenVerified, Spokeo, PeopleFinder, WhitePages, TruthFinder, etc) and use different variations of his first name, such as diminutives, initials, etc.
- Look for matches that are approximately the right age as your biological father.
- Contact the matches.
Don’t have your biological father’s name? That’s going to be tougher. It might be time to enlist the help of a professional genealogy firm that specializes in finding living family members.
Ancestry matches with distant relatives (smaller than 10 centimorgans long) can be inconclusive, but close matches are almost always correct. Likewise, if Ancestry says you are NOT a match for someone to whom you assumed you were genetically related, that is generally reliable. See our recent article on what it means when your DNA does not match Dad.
To date, there is no single, unified, national adoption registry for adult adoptees and birth families to connect. Instead, there is a patchwork of multiple registries, with some being state-specific. However, mutual consent adoptee search and reunion registries can be helpful to locating your biological relatives if you have the time to spend on them.
Most of our clients come from closed adoptions. However, in your search for your birth parents or other biological family members, the type of adoption doesn’t matter. If you need to find someone who is absent from your life, our job is to help you find that person.
No, Origins does not help with adoption plans or provide adoption services. We come into the picture many years after a closed adoption has been done, helping adult children from that closed adoption reconnect with birth parents, biological siblings, and other genetically-related family members.
If you are choosing adoption, whether as a consequence of an unplanned pregnancy or for any other reason, we’re sure you’ll pick a great choice from among the many waiting families out there!
The fact that your adoptive parents are of the same gender has little to no bearing on our ability to find your birth parents. The process is the same regardless of the genders of your adoptive parent, or other adoption situations.
We will handle your samesex adoption exactly the same as we would handle other adoption situations: we’ll examine Ancestry.com and other DNA databases for close genetic matches, and we’ll use our world-class research skills to round out the picture.
No, Origins Genealogy does not assist with adoptions. We know that unplanned pregnancy is a difficult situation to be in, and choosing to give your baby up for adoption is a deeply personal choice. We recommend you reach out to an adoption professional in your city who can answer all of your questions about adoption.
There are also some very good adoption blogs and other online resources that answer the most common questions, such as adoption costs, home study issues, adoption searches, child welfare, the adoption process, etc. Additionally, for adoption information that is more legal in nature, such as learning the adoption options and adoption laws of your state, you might consider consulting an attorney versed in adoption law.
Yes, the fact that your adoptive parents were foster parents first does not change the nature of the search for your birth parents. Foster care and adoption are a common pairing, and our job is still the same!